By Barry K. Weinhold and Janae B. Weinhold
What is the Partnership Way of Conflict Resolution
The Partnership Way is a form of relationship conflict resolution that helps people embrace conflict rather than avoiding it. We learned to embrace conflict because we found that it deepened the love connection between us in ways that advanced our consciousness.
When we discovered that most of our conflicts contain developmental wounds that create experiences of separation, we created developmental and systemic tools for embracing and uniting light and shadow dualities inside us so that we could experience more intimacy.
The Partnership Way of relationship conflict resolution also emphasizes the role of developmental trauma in creating conflicts, particularly the intractable ones. It also stresses the need to clear developmental trauma from the nervous system in order to stop the unconscious reenactment of behavior patterns via post-traumatic stress disorder.
Weve found that people often project their internal personal conflicts onto others, particularly their partners, co-workers or bosses. Collective conflicts are created the same way. Here people project hidden or unwanted parts of themselves onto a religious or ethnic group or a nation-state on another religion, ethnic group or nation-state. These groups or nations get labeled as the enemy or the source of the problem.
Underlying our Partnership Way of relationship conflict resolution is an evolutionary meta-theory we call Developmental Systems Theory, which shows how unhealed developmental trauma impacts the growth of individuals, couples, families, groups & organizations, nation-states and the human species. Developmental trauma not only blocks people’s ability to give and receive unconditional love, it also stops human evolution.
We recognize and emphasize unconditional love as the force that moves humans forward in both their personal development and their spiritual evolution. When people are able to give and receive empathy, compassion and unconditional love, they move forward in their evolution. We call this process LOVEvolution. When people are unable to give and receive love they not only get stuck in their evolution, sometimes they actually devolve. LOVEvolution also recognizes the value of devolutionary experiences as opportunities to clear traumas, wounds and karmic patterns. While not always pleasant, these experiences are an integral part of LOVEvolution.
Our book,Conflict Resolution: The Partnership Way, is written in a workbook format and contains many exercises and activities for relationship conflict resolution.